Full time specs

 

There are many things that stink about having to wear specs full time. Nobody ever talks about these things.

1. Smudges. Where do they come from? Even if I never touch my specs or go near anything gacky or sneeze or walk past a sticky child, smears appear.
2. Rain. What the hell am I supposed to do when it rains? I've settled for hiding behind my hair and tipping my head forwards and putting a hat on, and if the shower is heavy enough putting my specs in my bag for a bit (increasing the chances of smears, see above). Bloody rain.
3. Reading in bed. The only acceptable way to read in bed is head on pillow, lying on side, one hand stuck out to hold book, doona snuggled up over ears creating g a glorious snuggly head cave with hole for eyes. The only acceptable way. Specs make this Very Difficult. Special bed Pince-nez are starting to look attractive to me.
4. Hurty parts. Specs take some time for eyes to get used to. Nobody talks about other parts having to get used to specs. Sides of the bridge of the nose for instance. Or dear god the sensitive thin skin over cartilage at the back of the ear. The skin that really can't take much abrasion before the burny hurty sensation makes the spec wearer tetchy then ragey. That has had a week to toughen up and is still as wussy and hurty and complaint as it was the day it met the specs.

I can see better. I suppose that is something.